Weigh-In Wednesday..err Tuesday #2

So, I totally let way to many days go by since my last post. I thought about posting several times but I never made it a priority. I did however, actually do a weigh-in on Wednesday and I had lost 2 pounds last week. On January 10th, I was down to 193 lbs! Yay me! I feel good and I can tell that my tummy is getting smaller. I've followed the Trim Healthy Mama plan very well, minus one meal at a friend's house. (She made delicious spaghetti!) The next morning came, and I was right back on plan. This week, I've added in workouts and Bible study to my morning. So far, I'm two for two! Yesterday, I rode my spin bike while I jammed out to Christian cardio on Spotify, and this morning I tried out a new workout on YouTube using our rebounder (small trampoline) and an additional arm workout. The rebounder workout was a lot harder than I expected it to be and I had to stop bouncing a few times to catch my breath. I've been reading about all the health benefits of rebounding and plan on incorporating it as a regular workout.

My Bible study is focused on 1 John. I joined an online Bible study through Proverbs 31 ministry and it is using a book called I am loved written by Wendy Blight. I haven't started the online part of the Bible study yet, but I have began by just reading 1 John and journaling. I've never finished a whole Bible study before, and I always feel a little behind when I join them since I'm a chronic procrastinator, or even more accurate, I just don't plan my days well enough and waste so much time. My word for 2018 is VICTORY though, so I will celebrate each small victory. I want to be in God's word each day. I pray that the discipline of getting up each day to workout and read, will become habit, just like eating healthy and homeschooling my kids. Through small victories, I am sure that I will see larger victories!

Here is a picture of me from yesterday morning as I was preparing for a day of tutoring. I have been super successful this past week at keeping a good attitude about the things I am working on. My class last week went very well, and I felt the kids were very engaged and excited about knowing their material well. Yesterday wasn't quite as great, but never the less, we accomplished everything we set out to do. Another VICTORY! Tomorrow is another weigh-in Wednesday, and it also happens to be my 35th birthday! So I'm going to attempt some THM cakes today. Hopefully I'll find one that isn't gross. Stay tuned!

Handling Disappointment

What do you do when things don't go as you planned or thought they would? How do you take it when progress is excruciatingly slow or even backward? My tendency is to abandon ship in an attempt to stave off something worse, failure. It's not failing if it's my choice right? You see, this week, even though I said I was going to read my Bible and not weigh in until Wednesday, I did neither. I haven't even opened my Bible once this week and I've weighed in everyday. For two of the three days, the scale went up, although it was only slightly. I had a few moments of doubt and frustration. How can I be so good with eating and yet make no progress? It's been 4 whole days after all, gosh darn it!

So I took a chill pill and realized that maybe I was dehydrated on my first weigh-in day giving me a lower start point, or perhaps I gained a little water weight because I am a woman and our bodies are crazy and never do what we want. Of course if I had followed my plan all along, I wouldn't know that I fluctuated up nor would I have been frustrated. I didn't jump ship however! I remained steadfast and on plan to follow this Trim Healthy Mama lifestyle, and even though I didn't reach all my goals this week, I am on track. My body feels healthier, less bloated, and even my complexion looks better. I'm happy with my progress!

Tomorrow starts a new week, since today is Sunday, and with it brings the beginning of a new semester of school for my children and myself. I tutor a class in our local Classical Conversations community called Essentials where we go over some pretty intensive grammar and writing techniques. It hasn't been the most pleasant of years so far and to be honest, I really don't want to go back. I realize that I needed an attitude adjustment over this a few weeks back, so I've tried to have a more positive attitude when I think of it. I will admit to whining earlier today about having to write a lesson plan, however.  I have to maintain my positive attitude even though I don't feel like it all the time. I tell my oldest daughter that having a good attitude especially when you don't feel like it, shows maturity. I can fake it until I make it, and maybe I'll find myself enjoying those things I don't want to do. I believe in the program and the results I've seen in not only my own children but also the kids in my class.

Just like school, taking these steps to achieve a healthier life isn't easy or always fun. If I have a negative view of why I am doing it, following the steps is so much harder and I'm less likely to see success. Just like Classical Conversations, I believe in the process of Trim Healthy Mama, because I've seen it work in so many peoples' lives. I want to be a success story too, so this week, my focus is maintaining a great attitude about why I'm living this way and why God has me tutoring this class at this time. I don't believe it is without a purpose, so I need to keep that in perspective. Perhaps the key to handling disappointment is to alter my perspective and change my attitude.

Weigh-in Wednesday #1

It's Wednesday, but it feels like a Monday since it's our first day back to school and work after Christmas vacation. Actually I homeschool my kids and I totally made them do school yesterday too. Well, just my 14 year old daughter did a full day, while the other two just did a math lesson. Jake just left for work after being off for more than two weeks! I hope today will go smoothly, but back to school days rarely go as planned.I have a hair appointment this morning, so I got up early and did my make up.

I decided that I would only weigh-in every Wednesday so that I wasn't living my life for this scale. So this morning, I weighed in at 195 lbs. I'm feeling pretty optimistic about this 195 lbs, since I weighed myself last week and was about 4 pounds more than that. I've only been this heavy right after giving birth to each of my kids, so I have my work cut out for me.

I've decided to follow the Trim Healthy Mama eating plan. In the past 16 years, I've done Weight Watchers, Low Carb, No Carb, Slow Carb, Low Fat, Alli, Keto, Pure Slim, 21 Day Fix, Calorie Counting, and Trim Healthy Mama. I've pretty much tried everything there is including trying to hypnotize myself by listening to someone tell me I wasn't starving through headphones before bed. I think any of these plans can and do work, save the hypnotism route, however whatever plan you stick with (I stick with) is the one that is the best one. I truly like Trim Healthy Mama even though the weight-loss isn't as fast as some of the other plans. It's more sustainable and doesn't lend itself to an all or nothing plan. Meaning that when I encounter pitfalls, all is not lost. I have some friends working on their own trim healthy lifestyles, and my husband doesn't hate it either. Strength in numbers, I'm telling myself!

So this morning, I'm armed with a grocery list and my collagen coffee. I'm going to have a nice breakfast and read my Bible before I head off to get beautified. Before I leave you, here is my weigh-in Wednesday picture.

01/03/18  195lbs

It's 2018!

Happy New Year!

My family traveled home to Germany yesterday from Belgium, where we spent the weekend with our dearest friends to ring in the new year. While we didn't over indulge, I certainly wouldn't call what we ate healthy. We did make a pot of chili, but we added cheese, sour cream and potato chips as a side. I even grabbed a scoop of Haribo jelly beans from the local store after church. It was my last weekend to celebrate I reasoned. 

Now that the weekend has passed however, I'm left wondering what I do now. Should I make another New Years resolution that I've already determined will fail? Should I convince myself that I won't fail and to go for it? Do I muster up the will and the way and just dive in? Why is this time going to be different that every single time I've tried to lose weight before? The truth? I don't know that it will be. I don't have any secret weapons. I don't have any special roots or pills or potions that will aid my efforts, but the alternative is doing nothing. Not trying to lose weight, not trying to live healthy, not setting an example for my children to follow, and not investing in my future and the dreams I have doesn't seem like a satisfactory way to live either. 

So here I am at this same crossroads where I've stood every year for the last 16 years vowing to change. One way must lead in a circle, because how else do I wind up here again and again? The other way though, must be the path I'm looking for. The road to freedom from this cycle of repetitive failure, guilt, and depression. The trail I'm taking has potholes and IED's disguised as self doubt, hard days, lack of planning, and well intentioned friends who want me to "just live a little." With lots of prayer and unfailing support from my amazing husband I won't have to travel this journey alone. 

So here's to a new year, new friends, new experiences, and a new me! It's 2018!